So Simon has officially been gone for two weeks today, we have another 11 days until our family is glued back together in Canmore, Alberta. Some days seem to fly by and I forget that I'm single parenting a three year old and a 5 month old, while other days drag on and I watch the clock waiting for bed time. These days I feel as though I'll scream. Loneliness lingers throughout the day but catches up with me at night when I realize how much I miss my partner but also just how much I'm missing.
I have to admit though, I have it much easier than most single moms because:
a) I have a good partner
b) I have an incredible community of friends and family. Like, an unbelievable community. Grandmas/grandpas, aunts and uncles, cousins and friends who soften the blow.
c) It's temporary.
I wonder though, if all moms of young kids are going through this feeling of single parenting. We're all sorta sitting on the sidelines of our partners careers waiting for our time, even if we do go back to work, we still prioritize family first. I am doing this and not begrudgingly, don't get me wrong. I love my kids, they're a total pain in the ass, but I love them. Sometimes though I can't help but feel like everything in my life is stalled and learning to live with this can be a challenge, especially when your partners life is evolving and expanding and becoming something amazing, albeit, without you.
Learning to accept and love the space that I'm in right now has been my greatest challenge but I wonder if, when my children are grown, i'll look back and yearn for these days again, for the simple pleasures that make all the parenting hardships worth it. I'm pretty sure I will.
A lot of love to all the struggling mamas out there.
xA
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